Tag: spoof
member name: Carl, Prince of Prose, Villain of Verse
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July 22, 2006 04:19 PM EDT --
It's 107 degrees here in sunny Sacramento, Daddy is sweating like a pig in Purgatory and I just told the lawn to go eat sh*t and die cause I ain't mowing you today. I hosed down all the cats so . . .
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August 13, 2006 02:28 AM EDT --
I was informed this week of a great little site: http://www.churchsigngenerator.com/
The basic concept is that they have 5 church signs, which you are allowed to defame and deface at . . .
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August 05, 2006 06:19 PM EDT --
My only advice for Mel is to flog himself. Rigorous self-mortification of the flesh, like self-flagellation, will bring him closer to the pain of Christ and lead him to purification and final deliverance. . . .
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July 26, 2006 01:57 AM EDT --
Now folks, I struggled hard to write this, so be kind.
Kitty Kat, Kitty Kat, Where you been?
Lookin' round the world for Bin Laden.
Kitty Kat, Kitty Kat, Where he at?
. . .
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July 16, 2006 06:38 PM EDT --
The evil tomato is native to the American continent. It was first cultivated by the blood drinking, cannibalistic Aztecs, who used it as ketchup for their human BBQs. The expression "Bite me!" . . .
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April 22, 2007 05:31 PM EDT --
Memories,
Like the dust balls in my mind
Misty selectively edited memories
Of the way we weren't
Retouched pictures,
Of the dentured smiles we left behind
Photoshop takes . . .
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August 12, 2006 12:59 AM EDT --
Is the government aware that when you combine Mentos candy with Diet Pepsi it becomes a volatile explosive?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FYLQ_dE6ebk&mode=related&search=
Now what if the . . .
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May 30, 2007 03:33 PM EDT --
SAN FRANCISCO - Two humpback whales that swam from the Pacific Ocean far up into central California's inland waterways are within miles from open ocean, a U.S. government spokesman said today. . . .
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May 13, 2007 01:59 PM EDT --
Sung To The Tune Of: Camptown Races
Original Written By: Stephen Foster, 1850
(The original nappy-headed dialect has been removed to make the song easier for Democrats to sing and still maintain political . . .
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June 03, 2007 06:51 PM EDT --
Woo Hoo! I get to pop the cork on this group.
Yo ho, yo ho, an elitist's life for me.
We pillage, we plunder, we banks, and we loots,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
We look down on peasants with . . .
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June 17, 2007 04:09 PM EDT --
There is not a yearning of the soul
Which my meat cannot fill
There is not a pleasure I would seek
But to submit to my meats will
From hour to hour meat fills my soul
With peace and perfect love
My meat . . .
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July 21, 2006 12:59 AM EDT --
Just something from one of my old sketchbooks.
Not many of mom's old wive's tales, superstitions and ancient adages ever came true. But when one did, she took full advantage of it.
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March 08, 2007 03:29 AM EST --
"PHILADELPHIA (AP) -- An unknown number of new George Washington dollar coins were mistakenly struck without their edge inscriptions, including "In God We Trust," and made it past inspectors . . .
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March 14, 2007 09:42 PM EDT --
Being from Sacramento, California, I have learned that practically any idea, no matter how strange and obscure the reasoning, has a chance to make it to the legislature.
So I have composed . . .
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April 19, 2007 09:08 PM EDT --
A young niece is in her final year of high school and is beginning to learn what a "liberal" education is all about. Her instructor has persuaded her that capitalism is analogous with vampirism, . . .
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September 15, 2006 01:17 AM EDT --
Note: This was on my patio this morning. It was a very thoughtful gesture from my best friend Bob the Cat. It was our anniversary! I don't know how he remembered. There is just something . . .
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May 26, 2007 05:54 PM EDT --
Some old jokes I decided were in need of an update.
How many European Socialists does it take to change a light bulb?
One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, forty government
planners . . .
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May 30, 2007 06:09 PM EDT --
Is this real? - a Clinton/Gore ticket in 2008. Or a Gore/Clinton ticket. Am I dreaming? Maybe. It does have some possibilities and probably has a good chance for success. We don't hear . . .
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